Tonight on Tonight: A dialogue story (Curiosities)

This story is in my collection Curiosities: 

 Curiosities: An Eclectic Collection by CJ Carlin, Paperback | Barnes & Noble®

“Okay, everybody, so we got to talk to pop icon Marisa about her upcoming album entitled All Me, and we heard from actor Gery White about the allegations of insider trading. Now I want you all to welcome our special guest this evening, Overyxx from the planet Estor, who comes to us with a message of doom for all mankind! Overyxx, can you tell us more about your people and your plans for our planet?”

“My race is descended from the creatures you call ‘dinosaurs.’ Before the mass extinction, some of us were taken aboard a starship and transported to a safer planet, where we have been evolving for the last sixty-five million years. We are now millennia ahead of you in all respects, both as a civilization and the technological marvels we have created.”

“How fascinating! So, what brings you here? Is it our tacos?”

“It is not your tacos. We have returned to claim this planet. It belonged to us first, and it is prophesied among my people that it will belong to us again.”

“I see. Well, it’s hard to argue with prophecy! What else can you tell me?”

“Our operatives have been living among you for years. That is where the conspiracy theories about lizard people came from. Several important politicians and high-ranking executives are actually our people in disguise. They have been ensuring that the planet underwent some terraforming.”

“Oh, really? Can you tell me a little bit more about that?”

“The planet was too cold for us when we first came back. We had to engineer a global warming so that we could live here comfortably again.”

“Wow! Well, that sure explains some things, now doesn’t it, everyone? So, what are your plans for humanity? I’m sure we would all like to know that.”

“After observing your species for decades, we have concluded that you cannot be allowed to exist. You won’t stop killing things, including each other, and you seem to be trying to destroy even the planet itself. We were just going to enslave you, but research indicates that you get violent when subjugated, so that is just off the table.”

“Interesting. Well, that’s all the time we have for the evening. We’ll see you tomorrow night on ‘Tonight,’ when we will have a visit from our old friend and previous guest, Dr. Sydney Ashterworth. He’s going to talk about a new diet fad that might just kill you.”

“Cut!”

“I literally just said that my species is going to kill you all. The entire human race is now doomed.”

 

“Yes, I heard you, but we only have so much airtime; I couldn’t just let you go on and on, now could I? Thanks for appearing on ‘Tonight on Tonight’ tonight! The door out is that way.”

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